Finding A Happiness
by AllColourInTheWorld
Summary: (IchiRen). Renji and Ichigo has broke up for for a long time, after the break up Renji leave the town without a message. what Ichigo and the others don't know that Renji Pregnant with Ichigo's child. after three years finally they meet again and Renji realize he still love Ichigo. AU, M-Preg, slight ooc.
1. Chapter 1

**Note : This was my first to write a fanfic, and my english skill still low, so please not to hard to me.**

**Warning : This boyxboy story, so if you don't like it would be wiser to just not read it. And there one oc in this story.**

**Pairing : IchiRen, SemeUke**

**Disclaimer:** **I don't own Bleach**

**CHAPTER 1**

**(In The Past)**

_Spring has come, all cherry tress in the school ground have full blossom, it's really quite a sight when people stop and just enjoying the scenery._

_Renji walked down the hall to the classroom. Saturday is actually not a day to learn, only the students who participated extra cullicculer that comes to scholl today. Unfortunately the book containing the task of the teacher left under his desk. after arriving in his class he went straight to his table and took the book._

_After that he went out of the class and plan to go home, but as he pass the music room, there someone playing piano. "the music sounds very nice" he thought. unconsciously he sat leaning into the door of the music room and listen until the end. Before the person who plays the piano realized someone had heard, Renji has got up and gone from the site._

_after some time, he realized the person was only played a piano on Saturday alone, because of that every weekends Renji always come to school just to listen quitely. He never knows who plays the piano that so good both in skill and expresing the felling, and it seems like he does not have a plan to find out in the near future. 'maybe I was this person's fans.' he chuckle._

_The music that day was very soft and sound very sad that he become feel so sleepy. He doesn't realize the sound has stop quite awhile and there a soft footsteps. Therefore, Renji shocked because the door suddently open and he almost fall if he doesn't instanly grabbed the person's leg. Now he know the person that plays piano is a boy. Renji instantly notice the boy's hair, it was orange and it was not red like his hair or even brown like most people, it's clear orange like when sunset. It's so beatifull that he almost feel shame of his hair. The boy then spoke for the first time that make Renji out of his thougt "... who are you?"_

* * *

**(In The Present)**

Ringg... ringg... ring...

"..URG, its annoying... five... minute... again..". Renji groand, he turn off the alarm, but not by seconds there something that hit his ribs many times with something. That not hurts but it was realy annoying him, after five minute ignore it and the hit not halt even a second he gave up and then awake.

"hey, good morning sweety, you always know when it's time to wake up, don't you?" he laugh, and then smile brightly when he saw a toddler that was his son. Maybe it was a quite confusing and impossible to belief, but he was the one who contain and bear him. He was twenty three and his son just two this year. Renji was a single parent, but he was very happy and quite enjoy his life with his son even its quite hard to fund both he and his son in his young age and there was no family. Renji love his son very much that he won't exchange with anything.

"ma... mama... maa". His son calling him and that make Renji quit his mind and focus to his son. "ouw sweetheart, Ryoji please call me daddy, why are you always calling me mama?". Renji pout to his son just replyed with innoccent eyes and a cute smile that make his heart melt "oh whatever, quest I have ready for work" he sigh then he kiss both his son's cheeks and prepare for work.

After finish his morning ritual, he then prepare Ryoji for the day. Ryoji has a cute face, he has big brown eyes and a very beautifull smile that everyone almost melt when he did. His hair is almost orange and have a hint of red if exposed to sunlight, and for him, Ryoji was the most beatiful baby that come from heaven just from him. And everyone who know Ryoji felt the same, after all who will think that such a cute baby like Ryoji come from someone like Renji, its not like Renji is ugly or what, he's charming in his own way not like superstar or pretty boys ways but his crimson hair make a plus to his appearance and his tall, slim, and muscular body is enough make his appearance is more acceptable in the people eyes. It was his tattoos that almost all over his body and his cocky and brash personality that make peoples to think twice that Ryoji is his real son, much to his disdain.

When he think it's enough for preparation, he held Ryoji and went to the first floor and go direct to the living room.

"good morning Ryoji, and you to Renji". Said a beautifull woman with large chest and blond hair.

"Hey, why Ryoji was the one you greet first then me, I am the parent you know!" Renji glare, everyone grin to him "that because everyone prefer him than you". Spoke a man that has a bald head and then everyone laugh. He just ignore them all

"You want eat now little guy." Renji saw his son nod "What do you want to this morning?" he ask with smile

"hoc cacy, pwesse". Said Ryoji and then go to kitchen to prepare it. And he help his son to eat.

"oww, you have such a nice mother, right Ryoji." The blond girl squeel and pinch Ryoji's cheeks.

"Wait a minute, so _you_ are the one _who_ to teach my son to call me _mama_?" Renji dumbfounded.

"Who else, and not just me, the others to."

"Eyy, I am a _guy_, you know." He glared to everyone.

"Oh come on you are the one who _pregnant_, so of course you are the _mother_." Someone defense, there's a bit of sarcasm in his voice and the others just smirks and nod their agreement.

"che, all of you idiot." He rolled his eyes but then smile a little, he remember if he not meet this peoples maybe his life will full of stress. When he know that he is pregnant, he's panic and don't know what will he do for next future, then he meet an old friend that was one of his housemate, it was Shuuhei and after that he invite him to join with his group, fortunately everyone was very nice and receive his state, and everyone support him when he needs its especially when his pregnant, and when he gave birth to Ryoji everyone always dote Ryoji like he was they own son. Renji gratefull for that.

There was seven people in the house including him and one toddler, there was Shuuhei and his girlfriend Rangiku, Ikkaku and his bestfriend Yumichika, and then Hinamori and his boyfriend Kira.

The seven of them rent the house in Shinjuku, it was standard house with four bedrooms, his room is in the second floor and at the end of hallway, his room has one queen bed with many pillow and have protester because Ryoji sleep in the bed as well so if he buy single bed he affraid Ryoji will fall when he did't see, and there was one big window, one tv, one low table, one dresser, and many of Ryoji's toys (everyone in the house every months bring him toys even when Renji said that Ryoji has enough and always pleaded to them not to dote Ryoji to much, by the end he just can resist the puppy look in them). Two bathroom, one in first floor and one in second floor, there was one living room with two big and cozy sofa and flat tv, PS3 with many games cd, video player, etc. Then there one kitchen, not very big but not very small either, and almost every cook equipment is there because each of them much prefer home cooking, and dinning table for eight people.

Each of them is cowoker, they own dellivery service business names Rokungai DS. It's not very big but quite famous in Tokyo, for they good service, very loyal and always on time. And accually Ryoji become the mascot to their company, every time Ryoji come with them in office, somehow there always extra paid and they always give Ryoji many sweets, so they not feel disturbed when Ryoji come with them in work.

People exclude his friend don't know Ryoji was his real son, everyone think that Ryoji was adopted because he has little resemblance with him and out of pity, he don't realy care of that rumor and accually he rather happy with that, because of that he can relax a bit from worrys that his other father and his friends from past know about Ryoji and want to take Ryoji from him. All of his friend think he was to paranoid, but they all respect his desicion.

When they finished with breakfeast, he go to office with all of them, the office is just three blok from their house so they just walks.

"good morning everyone." greet one of their cowokers when they arrive "by the way there was one costomer in the room."

"at this hour? Ussualy, costomer will come arround nine." Kira comment, the cowoker just shrugged and continue his work.

"well, I guest i have to serve the customer." Rangiku said and went inside with Shuuhei, after all Shuuhei was the boss and Rangiku was the secretary.

After the two of them go inside, the rest of them went to their own task, Hinagiku for finance, Kira for distributing goods who and where the things that want to delivery, Ikakku, Yumichika, and Renji for delivering.

"I think it's time for us to work." Said Yumichika.

"Think so." The two agree.

"Hey Renji, you want to dellivery with bring Ryoji with you? " Rangiku suddenly come with the customer.

"If there necessary, why not?." Renji has a bad feeling about this "why?"

"Actually the customer want to delivery quite big quantity of goods in Karakura Town and there was onother customer that want to delivered in that town."

'_Oh...O! For god sake, why's there?'_ "Eh... So?" Renji ask

"So I want you the want to delliver there, after all you had live there for quite a long time right? And I assume that you almost know about derection in that town"

"Yeah, but why me, everyone here can almost know about the derection..." he almost whine about this one.

"True, but not like you. It just one and half hour from this city, Renji" Rangiku explain with a _no argument_ face "If you worry about Ryoji, you can either bring him with you or just entrust him with us."

"Oh come on it's not like the first time you had delivered things out of the city." She continued.

With big sighed Renji finally agree with her "hah... okay then." He said with scowl in his face "I guest Ryoji will stay with you, can he?"

"Of cource he can, I will take care of him." Hinagiku came with soft smile in her face, Renji can not help but smile back to her.

Other employee then fills the truck with goods that have to dellivered. Rangiku give Renji the addresed, it was three place that he have to delliverd, one is in elektronik store, second in the appartement, and the last in the orphanage. Renji was very surprised with the last, and almost choke with his own saliva. He then more surprise when he saw who the one that want to send goods there. His expression must be clear with surprise because someone realize and ask him.

"You okay Renji." Yumichika ask with worries face.

"Ahh.. yeah... of cource." He answered with big grin, Yumichika don't quite belief him, but not urged futher.

'_After all it's not like I have to meet all of them. I had move on from then'_ He assured to himself.

Before depart, he go to office and play a little with his son, when he see his son's face, his mood lighter, and then he kiss Ryoji forehead and say goodbye. The trip from Shibuya to Karakura Town very smoothly, when he arrive in Karakura Town many memories come to him but its not a bad feeling, 'i think its not to bad after all' he thought.

Then he deliverd the first task to elektronik store, then to the appartment, and the last, he rememberd this place from the bottom of his heart beside it was his home from very long time, and his place to grown up, the orphanage was in the rim of the city and almost half of the orphan kids in the city was in here. The owner is a nice old man that have a big company and many of branch throughout World.

There nothing change in the past three years from the last time he visit this place, there three houses in the area, one for age zero to five years old kids and the house is collored with blue and have variety image of animal, the second house is for six years old to twelve years old, and collored with green, the last house is for thirteen years old to fifteen years old and colored with light brown, the last house is place where they ghaterd for eat, plays together and hold an events. All nurseses was very kind and always listen when you have a problem and always want to help in their own ways. When you sixteen you have to out to public, the orphanage help you with gathered to school and getting a job.

"Is that you Renji" someone calling him. The man is very old but the spirit and the body was still very healthty like when he was younger, the old man wears a simple grey kimono, but Renji know that kimono was very well made and very expensive, his hair entirely gray, and until know his surrounding still pull out aura of dignity.

"Yes it is, I don't even think you still alive, old man?" Renji have a big grinned when he realize whose the one calling him.

"You insolent kid, I think you forgot about this place." The old man scowled, but then he gave him a soft smile.

"Of course not old man, just busy with work." At this the old man arched an eyebrow and his eyes say _oh really now?_. Renji sighed and continue "okay, okay, I just don't want to stay in this city for a long time."

"So why you here now?" the man ask.

"To deliver something, _someone_ just really want to give them _strange bunnys _doll to them."

The old man frown "She know about you wellbeing?"

"I don't think she know, one of my cowokers was the one who persuade me to take the job."

"okay then, so know do your job, and after that come to my office."

"Fine."

Then he complete his job, and then he realize that the place was so quite, just some people that has in there, much to his delight almost everyone in there is new and not knowing him.

"Why this place is so quite? It not rundown right."

"Of cource not, one of the nurse want to have a picnic in beach, and everyone want to join her."

"So why don't you participate?"

"I am to old." He sigh

"..."

"..."

"What?" the old man raised one of his eyebrow

"Nothing important." He shook his head vigorously.

"Well, how your life."

"Fine, i guest. Everything went very fast, but i have my own of joys."

"You meet someone?"

"If you meant someone is a friends so the answer is yes."

"So I conclude you haven't meet someone special then, if this because you still have a felling for him, so you don't want to even visit here for a along time now?" he tease "Actually i will very happy and feel peacefull in my old days if you want to become my grandchild-in-law."

Renji hold himself to not rolled his eyes "I don't want to dishonour you, but I will said this straight. First of all, old man Yama I don't came here for a while because the reason is _entirely_ something _else_ from what you accused but I can't tell you _what_ it is, second I don't know if I still has a felling for him or not and the last even I still has a felling I won't never ever become your grandchild-in-law, get it?"

"Okay then." The old man sigh, "But just for know." He add

"Oh you must be kidding me."

"You know very well that I don't like to joke... He miss you, you know."

At this Renji just can't hold to not rolled his eyes, so he did "Please old man Yama, I'm pretty sure he just miss me as a _friend_." He commented "Plus I think he has a beautifull and wonderfull lover in his side by know, beside he's famous now, he can have everyone he likes, don't argue with this I know we know it's true."

"... You don't sound dissapointed about this." He said while he examine Renji's eyes to jugde if Renji said the truth or just lie for himself.

"Of course am I, I'm very happy and content about my life right now." He said and have a big smile when he said all those thing, the old man know Renji said the truth.

"Haah... fine then."

Renji feel very gratefull at this "Old man, Ii don't want my visit here known by others, I just don't want them ask many question from me, I'm not ready yet." he pleaded.

"Very well then." And then he saw the clock "If you don't want to meet them, I guest you have to leave now, they will be arrive soon enought."

After hearing that, he quickly stand and says his goodbye, then go to his car very fast, but when he start the engine, the old man ask the last question to him.

"Say Renji, do you hate him and feel grudge to us?" This question make him froze and think about the question _'I never think about this question' _he realized_ 'when I'm pregnant and after give birth, I never really thougt about this, my mind full of my new life and my son, am I hate him and had a grudge to them?'_, after a thirty second past, he then know the answer and with big smile and a hint of laugh he answer them.

"Not never once. Very sad and almost despair, yes. Maybe I hate him at first but just a while, but I forgave him and accepeted this as one of bad experience in my life. And I still considers you and the other as my family, you were one of people that gave me a reason to life and I gratefull for that."

"That was your answer then?" the old man said with a soft eyes and relieef smile. "Remember if you need help or even just someone to talk, do not hesitate to come here"

"Sure, Then I take my leave now, take care of yourself old man."

"You to then."

When Renji finally leave, he sighed. "You really will have to work harder to make him back." He said to no one.

* * *

After Renji leave a Porche 911 has arrive in the orphanage, Genryusai tense a bit and currios if she saw him or not, but after a bit he shrugged, and thougt maybe it was for the better, he can't say about him to anyone but if someone known about this for their own attempt then it's not his problem.

Just for awhile, Rukia thougt he saw a redhead when she almost arrive in orphanage, but it was impossible right? After all he would never come after what happen in the past, and then her best friend suddenly gone and never contact her it's make her sad and feel pretty useless.

maybe it was just her hallucination because she miss the redhead so much, but when he saw Genryusai in the terrace she then thougt if it just a maybe, maybe _he_ really came here.

"Hello Genryusai-san, how are you?" greet the petite woman with a smile, she wear a white dress that has a print of orchid flowers.

"Hello to you to Rukia, and I'm very well."

"Well, you look quite happy, is there something good happens?"

"yeah, actually an old acquintance came here for visit after quite a while." He said with a smile and there's a glint in his eyes that Rukia can't intrepet. "And by the way thank you for the the doll."

When she heard it was an old acquintance he hope rose a bit "and old acquintance, if you may can I have know who it is?" "And your welcome, I hope the kids like the doll."

"I don't thing you knew about this person, he sure had been one of orphanage in here but it was really a long time ago. And I'm sure the kids will like, but just for my curriosity why are you brought it in Tokyo, why not in this city?"

"Oh, I see. Well about that, when I call all the store in this town the edition is sold out, fortunately one of my friend's has big amount of this edition."

When she want to ask about this person again, the group has arrived, and she busy herself to share her present, when he finally finish her job, Genryusai has to attend a bisnis meeting and have to go. But Rukia has a strong felling about this one, so she ask the security, the security was new but she think if she point out about the redhead appeareance maybe the security can tell her, beside how many people in Asia that has a red hair?

"Think of it, a minute ago there was a delivery man to drop the doll, and he has a red hair?" the security answered her question.

Even it almost one hundred persen what he suspect was true, but it not hurt to make sure. "If he has a tattoo in his head?"

"I think so, he wear a bandana in his head so I can't make sure of that. Is there a problem?"

"Oh, no, no, it's enough, thank you very much."

For last five years, she never felt so happy like this, even she has a little doubt to herself. _'after this time, can he still assume me as his bestfriend?'_. At least now she knew where to find her bestfriend, and to her relief her bestfriend was fine.

Maybe after gather a little courage she will meet her bestfriend.

**Okay that end of chapter one. I know that there was many mistake in speeling and grammar, but I hope you still enjoy this story.  
**

**Please review if you like this story, and let me know if you want me to continue or not.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Note : English is not my first language, so there will many error in spell and grammar. Please be patient with me.  
**

**Disclaimer : I do not own Bleach.  
**

* * *

**CHAPTER 2**

* * *

**(In The Past)**

_Two months has passed after that incident, although since the first day they met until now they always fought by anything, but their friendship tighter day by day. He still don't know about him very much, but when he said his name is Kurosagi Ichigo, somehow it's ring the bell in his head, but because Renji being Renji he just shruged it off. It was really hard for him to be friend with Ichigo at first, he has a permanent scowln in his face, and he very much anti social and always keep his cold appeareance that Renji know it just a mask immediately, he was stubborn and short-tempered like him, maybe this things that make them be a friends in the first place._

_For some reason Ichigo and he always hang out in music classroom after end of school so there were no one else beside them. Sometimes they just sitting in silence while looking out off window in silence with a little conversation there and then. That was some moment that Renji treasure a lot. He knew that he began falling in love with the orange head, fast and hard at that. But Ichigo interest in someone else, he can feel it even though Ichigo never said a word._

_sometime when Renji feel his homeworks is to hard to understand, okay that a lies, everytime he had homeworks he always says one thing "Why are Those stupid Teachers always give us a fucking homework, it's pretty useless you know. And why it so hard, I can't even understand a little bit." Said Renji as he slammed the book on the floor, and Ichigo always commented "If it's useless Renji, there is nothing like 'school' around the world, and it was just you born as an idiot as you are that you can't understand a little bit." That lead them into another argument that always ends by Ichigo helps Renji to do his homeworks._

_One day at Saturday, Renji sat beside the window while he heard Ichigo playing piano, 'Even I heard his played over and over, I can't still have enough hearing him, it's so beautiful' Renji always commented in his thought._

_"Ne, Ichigo. Can I ask you something?" He started._

_"If it's not one of your stupid questions, maybe I will answered it." Said Ichigo not even halt his tempo._

_"Bastard, I just want to ask you why you always play just in Saturday?" he gritted his teeth_

_"There nothing really special reason, I just don't want someone hear when I was playing then disturbed me, like you do now."_

_"Okay, okay, I'am sorry for disturbed you." He raised his hand and appologize, then Renji stand up and sit down beside Ichigo "And is there a reason you always plays sad song, is it because you sad or what? He finally ask what he really want to know from the beginning._

_Ichigo's face hardened but it's went as fast as it's appears and his fingers stop for a second. "No" he answered him. But Renji saw the change on Ichigo's face, sure he curious but because it's Ichigo's personal matter and don't want to offend him, he let it go._

_"Oh well, you know Ichigo I think you've to let other peoples listen to your played."He quickly change the subject._

_Ichigo raise an eyebrown "I consider it was a compliment then."_

_"It is a compliment you idiot, even I don't want to admit it but you've big tallent at this. Every time you played it's always makes a beautiful sounds."_

_"So that way you always eavesdropping me? I think if I not caught you in act you will still just listen me secretly." Ichigo smirked_

_Renji face painted as red as his hair when he hear Ichigo's teased. "Hey,, I thought I had appologized about this problem many times now, why you always bring it back?"_

_"After all what I just did was listen and not distureb you. And it was just when I passed by" He defensed._

_"Right, right, so why are you blushing now?"_

_"URG... ICHIGO." He shout still with flushing very hard. He attempt to kicking his legs, but Ichigo dodge faster that make renji kick one buffer of the piano. " OW...! THAT HURTS...! ... STOP LAUGHING, YOU ASSHOLE!."_

**(In The Present)**

"Oww.. Ouch... Please stop that Ryoji." Shuuhei begged as Ryoji throwing his toys to one of his uncles. Ryoji rarely do something like this that makes the adults frown.

"NO... whel maaama?" he whining and walked away from the others searching his mother.

"Why he upset and why he just thrown at you?" Ask Yumichika.

"If I can speak babies language, I will knew by now!" Shuuhei scofed, ussually after Renji and Hinamori, he was the one that closer to Ryoji.

"Maybe he upset because his mother has left him for quite long." Someone gave an idea, even the most stupid person know that it was imposible, Ryoji always behave with or without his mother.

"No way, it's not the first time Renji leave him alone with us, after all he just go to market!"

"What you all talking about?" ask Hinamori with a crackle of groceries in her hands, she was with Renji that carry almost everything of groceries, then they place it in the kitchen. Hinamori put every ingredient in refrigerator.

Almost after Ryoji saw his mother, he walk to his direction quickly (as fast as a toddler can) and jump to his direction. Renji caught him and picked him up, "hey sweethearts, what's wrong?" while stroking his backs.

"Mama... Howc..." Ryoji mumble in his mother chest (Renji has gave up to make Ryoji call him father or papa, one versus six people is unequal, of course he will lose).

"Eeehh?" Renji quite confused at first, then he touch his son forehead. "Oh shit Ryoji, you've fever." He cursed a little, everyone at the room has a little panic attack and began run to various directions.

"HEEYY, Ikkaku where the last time you put medicine for children?." Ask Rangiku while she rearranged the medicine box.

"I think it's still there, I will search in my room" Ikkaku then run to his room and began searching.

"Icepack... icepack... where the hell that stupid thing gone." Yumichika search in refrigerator almost thrown all the thing out the refrigerator.

Renji watch all his friends run to one place to others with amuse eyes, he sighed and shake his head. Sometimes he confused why the others more panic then him when his son's sick.

"Calm down guys, it's not the first time Ryoji's sick, I will go upstair and put him sleep and measure his body temperature." Said Renji while carry Ryoji to their room "And I think in my room still has medicine for him."

Everyone then calm a little, in the bottom of their hearts they know even thought Renji has rough personality but when it comes to his son, he became a good parent.

In the room he take care of his son, and when he see his son has asleep, he left the room quietly, and go downstairs. Everyone has calm down by that time, and they watch show on tv. When they see Renji, Hinagiku timidly ask him "how he's condition?"

"He's fine, thank" He smile "By the way why don't you knew that Ryoji was sick, he's with you all the time." He demand.

"He don't want to be touch, and he constantly thrown me with toys if I went near him." Answered Shuuhei.

Renji sighed _'He's really like him when he sick.'_ He thougt with sad smile on his face "Where's Kira?"

"He visit a friend in the hospital."

When Renji want to ask who, Kira had come home "Ah, Speak of the devil."

"And the devil is came." Kira joke while chuckle.

"Hey, there a woman outside who had been loiter around the house." He said with serious face.

"Who?" Ikkaku ask.

"Don't know, I ask her but she just said that she not sure that it was the right place, and when i ask again about who the one that she want to..." when he want to said something Rangiku break the speak.

"What she said?" Now Rangiku feel interesed.

"I hope it's not a stalker, you know with my beauty, people will not be able to resist." Yumichika said as he looks his appeareance on the mirror.

"Like hell it will." Ikkaku said, rolled his eyes.

"So what she said?" Rangiku push it.

"haah... please don't cut my speak, she said she want to meet a long friend of her."

Everyone frown and look at each other "She doesn't said her name or her friends name, and I guest she was very nervous." He add.

"Well then how she looks?" Shuuhei ask him.

"She short and petite, has a light skin-"

"and have a short black hair and violet-colored eyes?" Renji continued with surprise looks on his face, Kira just nod at him.

* * *

Twenty four years she has alive, just this time that she felt so tense and nervous like this, well maybe except when she's dealing with her brother when she was younger. She just want to ring the doorbell or knocking the door, '_Oh come on brave youself, it's not like he will instantly murder you when he see you'_ she thought, but in the end she hesitant and didn't do anything. When she finally gave up and turn back and plan to try another times, she heard someones talking, and she knew exactly the owner of the voice.

"You know what, if this kept on, even ten years we never meet with each other." Renji laugh "You just tiny as ever, don't you Rukia?" Renji make notice the change of his best friend locks, her hair is more shorter now, she height is still the same and her childish appeareance still there even its reduced a lot.

Rukia turn back again and she almost can hold back tears "It was just you that big like qiant." The tears just fell in her cheecks. Rukia hug him, Renji immediately responsed and hug back.

"You big idiot, don't you know how worry I am when you missing?" she shout while she beating his chest with her hand

"I missing you, you know. I feel pretty useless that you never notify or let me help you." She said after calm her nerve and leaned back from the hug.

"I know Rukia and I'm sorry for that, and I missing you too." He said as he ruffle her hair

"Wow, look at you, your hair longer that almost to your waist. What, you have a plan to become a woman?" She grinned, Renji just laugh at her joke _'if you know about Ryoji maybe you will said that I'am a woman in mans body'_ he rolled his eyes for his own jokes.

"You want to talk somewhere else?" Rukia frown at this

"It's not like I not let you in, but my housemates is a meddlesome peoples, right know they all eavesdropping in the back of the door." He whisper and smirk when he saw Rukia's expressions. When she saw in Renji back, she realized the door was open a little and true to his word, all of his housemates peeks from back the door.

"You have interested housemates." She commented with giggle

"So?"

"Well, I want to chat longer." She answer the previous quetions "But, I still has to work right know, but I will come here again soon."

"Okay then, just gave me your number, I will contact you when I'm free." Rukia then gave him her number.

When she want to leave she want to appologized to him "Renji I'am so sorry about what happen in the past, I can't even help you out, i can't even defend you, I'm really, really sorry." She said almost in tears again but when she open her mouth again Renji cut her off.

"You don't needs to appologized Rukia, it's not anyone fault. I was the one that choose to leave, and I've debt to say sorry to you too Rukia, so don't feel down because of me." he ruffle her hair and give her big smile.

She then give him smile too "Well, goodbye Renji, please contact me if you needs something."

"Take care. Oh and Rukia is there someone beside you that know I'm here?"

"No, it's just me, why?"

"Can you not tell anybody about me? I'a not ready yet."

"Okay then." She gave him big smile "When you ready, I will stay beside you. I promise."

* * *

"What?" Renji snaped when he came in the living room, everyone stare at him like he has a disease, it's make him irked,

"Sooo.. whose her? Your ex-girlfriend, I've to say you has a taste she's very ellegant." Ikkaku and Rangiku smirk at him,,

"Stupid, he gave _birth_ a child, ring a bell?" Yumichika commented,

"Ignore them Renji, can i know who she is?" Hinagiku smile but you can see her eyes that held to much curiosity. And everyone eyes set on him.

Renji sighed and then sit beside Kira "haaa... she not my ex and when you see her personality you would thing twice that she was ellegant. She more like my sister, she orphan like me and we were in the same orphanage until she adopted to rich people. But she and I still contact with each other until I came here."

"What her names then?" Shuuhei inquire

"Kuchiki Rukia." Everyone eyes widen with shock.

"You mean that Kuchiki?" Renji rolled his eyes at their antics.

"One of the richest family in Japan, yes _that_ Kuchiki." Renji amend.

"No wonder, she has such a nice car." Yumichika said admiring her cars.

"Wait, Rukia... Rukia... Rukia, where I had heard that name?" Rangiku trying to rembember something, "Ah, was this the same person that want to delivery dools in orphanage a month ago?"

"Yuup, that's true ."

"Why it just bunnys?" ask her again.

"don't know, bunny is always be her obsession from when we teens." He shrugged "I've go bedroom know, got'cha check Ryoji."

Then he walk to kitchen to have another ice to compress Ryoji, and make carrot juice for him. After that he walk to their room. When he enter the room, he see that Ryoji has awake and search him, when he spot Renji he smile brightly and a little jump in the bed. _'even when he sick he still very lively'_ he giggle and smile back at his son. He walk to his son and check his temperature and make him eat a little, Ryoji was never a picky eater, but always prefer it when Renji was the one who make it.

Renji feel relieve when Ryoji temperature has almost back to normal again, maybe after rest again he will healthy as before. Like if he can feel his mother's mood he laugh and nuzzle his face in Renji hand.

"Okay now you have to eat the medicine." Renji said

"noo, ich bitcl." He shake his head as he close his mouth with his hands.

"fine, what do you want?"

"warc tv pwesess." Ryoji face lit up, and crawl in his mother's lap.

"Eat medicine first then wacth."

"mmhh... Ocay." Finally Ryoji eat his medicine with a funny face that make Renji chuckle. "wacth tv now." He ask with puppy dogs locks.

Who Renji that can refuse his request. Then he turn on the tv and begin search a program for childreen. But when he almost push the button, there a news about a famous international pianist just arrive from his world tours and will performing in one of well known Hotel in Tokyo, but it was just for exclusive. Renji really want to change the channel althought he forgave him long ago but it still hurts if he saw his face, maybe he still has a felling for him after what happens.

Ryoji immediately cry if he change the channel. It was like he aware the object person from this news is his other parents, but it was impossible, and soon enough he realize what make he so much like the news was the music, the music is classical music played with piano, Renji recognize immediately who the one that can produce a rich sound like that. He turned his head down, and saw Ryoji's face had a happy expression. "You can feel that the one who playing this is your father, huh?" Renji ruffled his hair and gave a loving smile. Renji then recalled an important moment when he still with him.

His daydream cut off when he heard Ryoji sobbed and tugged at his sleeve, that make him realise that the news was finished long ago. Ryoji looked at him with worried eyes. "It's okay sweatheart, I'm fine. Let see another program, okay?" He shoothe his son and change the channel. After Ryoji satisfied, he feel drowsy and felt asleep in Renji's lap, Renji puts Ryoji at bed gently and kiss his son's cheeks, after put the blanket he go to dinning room.

It was dinner time, so everyones was there and food has been prepared, that when he remember it was his turn to make dinner. "Sorry everyone, I forgot." He said sheepishly and his hand stroking his hair. Everyone just smile at him.

"It's fine Renji, we know you preocupied with Ryoji." Said Hinamori.

"So how Ryoji?" Ask Shuuhei with worried that clear in his voice.

"Nah, he's fine. Just need a rest for a while." He smile at them, and everyone has a relief sighed hearing that. _'they really love him.'_ Renji though with full of gratitude for all of his housemates.

After he finished his dinner, he walk outside the house with determined face and make a call to Rukia. He waited for five seconds.

"Hello?"

"Hello, it's me..."

"Wait a minute." He heard she said goodnight to someone and excuse to leave early then he heard sound of door open and close. He assume that she now run to her room very fast.

"Hai Renji, sorry to make you wait." She finally said.

"It's alright, am I disturb you or something?" He feel slighly guilty.

"Definitely _Not_, I actually feel so happy you called at the right time, a family gathering and _always_ have to make them please was _definitely_ not my speciality." He then heard her pull out a big sighed.

"I fell sorry for you then." Renji said but not really meant it "It's quite surprising that Byakuya would let you run away!"

"My brother saw that I _need_ a rest so he let me go." She respond "So what make you calling me so soon, you not in trouble right?" she ask, she really concerned about him.

"I'm not a little kid, you don't have to always worry!" he heard Rukia chuckle at this.

"But it's true that my reason for calling is because I needs yout help, ...you know that Ichigo want to hold a show in Hotel and it was just for exclusive?" he state

"... yeah, I know, so?"

"So I want you to find me the ticket, of course I'll pay for it." Well even he not to sure about this one, but he guts says that he must do it.

"... Are you... sure...?" Rukia can't bealief what she was heard

"Please don't ask, it's really make me get out all of my courage."

"fine then, do you have a formal dress then?"

"Nng... No." Anyway for what he had to have a formal dress, he never went to a show like this. It was just one times when he came to piano's competition to support Ichigo, but it was really long ago, he even don't know where he keep the suit now.

"I thought so, listen the show is this Sunday, so two days again I'll take you to buy a suit, it's my treat and don't complain. You just have to pay the concert ticket, deal?"

"... Fine then." He knew exactly from past experience that when Rukia decides something, it's hard to change it.

"Last things Renji, why you want to go there?"

"Because I make a Promise."


	3. Chapter 3

**Note : English is not my first language, so there will many error in spell and grammar. Please be patient with me.**

**Disclaimer : I do not own Bleach.**

* * *

**CHAPTER 3**

* * *

**(In The Past)**

_Ichigo and Renji were at one of their favorite places, it's on top of the hill that showed almost half of the town, they laid on the ground beside each other while watching the sky, it was sunset that time and everything almost looks orange. Renji really wish that these days just will continues on, he was very happy to just laid beside the one he love the most, every times Ichigo's happy he can felt something warm's spread inside him, and everytimes Ichigo's breathhes he can felt that his heart were beating in the same times. Every single componen in his body were dependent to Ichigo's. However he knew that this love only led him to despairs and sadness, how could he fall in love to someone that love somebody else? He don't need to knew it, if it will makes Ichigo's feel happy he won't care. He only wish Ichigo won't deceive his own feelings and those around him._

_Actually this place was the place when he or Rukia was upset or feeling down. You have to pass through a narrow lanes that covered by trees and shrubs. People rarely see it That's way most people doesn't know about this place. So that wasn't coincidence that this place can be this quiet._

_About a month ago he found Ichigo walked aimlessly at the street and looks very frustrated, he seemingly just finished cried, his eyes swollen and the remaining tears were still on his cheeks. Renji tried to ask him the reason and cheered him up, but Ichigo was a very stubborn man and a proud one at that, he wouldn't tell him anything, and always said that that was nothing, not a big deal, and everything was fine. Every attempt to comfort him were brush aside. Renji sighed and just want to give up, but seeing Ichigo so broken like that, he can't just leave him alone, so he decide to take him to this place and apparently it's really make his moods much better. And now if they have had times they will came here together._

_"Do you know in few weeks there will be a piano contest?" He abruptly said._

_"So what?" Ichigo raised an eyebrows, unimpressed with what Renji's said._

_"I know you aren't stupid" he sighed "I wish you will participate in the contest." Renji said with hope in his eyes._

_"From what I know, What will I decide is what I wished." He reply with disdain._

_"That's true, I just hope you're to participate. I'm sure that you will win the first place." He really mean it, Ichigo had a talent, he just should had more confident._

_"You speak like you know what will happen, you aren't the jury, there will much more talent competitor in there!" He really wish that Renji just drop this topic, he play piano were just hobby and for funs, not to reveal to everyone. Much to Ichigo disappointed he's not give up yet._

_Renji think for a moment, he sure there's something in Ichigo's that not just a talent, but something that make people will listen and love hearing at every music he will plays. "Yeah maybe, but I still pretty sure that you will win the grandprize."_

_Ichigo sighed "so what if I possibily win." At this Renji give him a big grinned, even just a little Ichigo started thinking to participate._

_"well, i guess...mmh.." he trailed a bit to add effect and continue, "we..lll... I guess you will famous in this industry, make much money came to you, became a rich bastard, have many fans and everyone waiting in line just to become your girlfriend or 'boyfriend'." He snickered "So what're your decisions?"_

_"Even I said No you will keep to pastering me right?" He scofed as he rolled his eyes._

_"Yes. And you know what if you're really become famous, I'll make sure to come to your concert or recital."_

_"Are you sure? beside if I make it to become famous, it will take years and by then maybe we'll become enemy or hate each other, I don't think you are really came to my concert if something like that happen." He point out._

_"Okay...! Fine...! I will make swear to you that even we really becomes enemy and hate each other, I will remain to going to your concert, promise!" He swears._

_Ichigo laugh at his childishness. Renji like to hearing his laughing, it will makes his days more perfect than before, unfortunately Ichigo always wear a serious and cool expression._

_"Then, I can't help but participate too." He said after the laugh is ceased._

_"YESS!" Renji grinned in glee. "I think it's unfair if just me who're promise, I want you to promise me something too."_

_"What is it?"_

* * *

**(In The Present)**

He watch his reflection in the mirror, he's so nervous that make his face paler than usual and his whole body trembled. His mind always think the same over and over '_Maybe it was a bad decision... no way I will go to somewhere like that place... what will someone I know see me... or what it is him that see me?_... _Oh for goodness sake why I ever think about this in the fisrt place?... how I suppose to do in a place like that?'._

Renji thought interruped by knock in the door "Renji are you okay, you were in there for almost two hours." It was Shuuhei that ask.

"I'm not sure myself, why do I have to force myself to fulfill a stupid promise in the first place?" He conclude, he felt like throwing up for the umpteen time.

"Renji , if you want to change your mind it's okay, no one will be forcing you." He tells Renji in hope will ease his worries. Of all his friends, Shuuhei was the only one that known almost everything about Renji's past and problem.

"Nah, I'll do it. Promise is still a promise." He feel foolish to carry out a promise that most likely already forgoten by him.

Several minute later, he inspect his appeareances for the last time. Yesterday, Rukia has dragged him for one store to others, after Rukia force him to tried all of the suit in the about the fourteenth store, Renji has had enough and yell his frustrations to her, finally Rukia choose one of the suit. It was a deep black fitted suit, a red shirt with black tie and buckle, and a black silk scarf for his head. After approve his own appeareance, finally he left the bathroom.

"..."

It was so silence when he get to living room, every eyes stare at him (Renji think it's like a dejavu) like he was crazy or a wild animal that lost in the city (for them it was most likely the later). When he can not stand any longer in silence, he cleared his throat and succeeded even the reactions was not his expetations. They blink once, twice, thrice... then they laugh like there's no tomorow. Renji eyebrow twitch several times, if it's not because Ryoji in his lap he surely will kill them all.

"Oh, come on...! is this really that funny?" He snapped.

"haa.. ha.. haa... it's not like... that...but you in suit are definitely ridiculous." Ikkaku said after his laughter has deceased.

"Thank." He glared at him. "not you to Hinamori." Renji almost whined

"Sorry, can't help." Hinamori just giggle, teasing Renji is always fun to her.

"Anyway why're you wear a suit?" ask Kira

"To a hall of cource. Where's else?" He said sarcastically

"Yeah, but for what?" Ask Kira again

"I want to see a show."

"what show?" Yumichika ask, they know Renji won't wearing a suit just for see a show. He much prefer watch it in tv, and they pretty sure to see a _normal_ show was no need to wear a formal attire.

"Classical music that performed by piano." He said again.

"What they ask is who's the one will perform the show, Renji." Hinagiku point it out.

"Kurosaki Ichigo." He yield

"WHAT? Why you not ask me to? It's limited right, why you can have the ticket?... Oh dear, I really want to go there to..." rumble Rangiku and Yumichika almost together, they has a dreaming looks on their face.

The others just rolled their eyes. "Ever since we meet until now, I don't know that you like or _even_ a fans of classical music. Anyway I got the ticket from Rukia."

Rangiku stare at him. "I don't know that you are a classical music's _fans _too_,_ and are you kidding me? Of course I know him, even I don't really like classical music, when I heard his piano he can make me feel like I was in another world. Just his appeareance make me infatuated and drooling. He's so cute..." She explained with passioned at every word she spokes as Yumichika nod in agreement.

"I'm not a _fan_, I just go there because Rukia want me to accompany her." He lied a little to them, he want to tell them the truth but not this time. They're know about his past but never about Ryoji's father's name.

"Well, just don't forget to ask his autograph for us... ah and a foto too, please." Rangiku pleaded

"... okay, but no promise." He sighed.

When the clock show it's 05.30 pm, someone ring the door ."It must be Rukia." He conclude. "Little guy, mama will out for a while I'll come home soon enough. Please be nice, okay?" he kiss Ryoji's forehead and ruffle his hair.

As if he understand the words Ryoji smile brighly, pecked his cheek and walked toward his uncles as he crawl at Kira's lap. Renji chuckle at his son's behavior, really Ryoji sometimes more mature than other kids at his age.

"Take care of him, please. And don't let him near my sunglasses collections (for some reason Ryoji like to play with his sunglasses and tossed it in all directions)." He ask them all. "We will." They answered almost immediately.

"Have fun." Shuuhei said with smile as he waved his hand at the redhead.

After take his wallet and cellphone, he open the door. There's Rukia waiting for him, she wear an ivory colourd dress made from silk that the dress length was not over her waist, she's wear cassual make up which makes her more modest and ellegant. Rukia looked him up and down then nod in satisfaction. She think her choice of clothes really suit him well.

"Hey handsome, Ready to go?" She grinned and winked her right eye and turned to her car, Renji eyes's widened when he saw the car.

"Wow... I never been in Limo before, guess if I don't being friend with you I'll never ride an expensive car." His mouth slighly dropped. The raven girl just giggle as she get in.

"Care to tell me how your life until now?" Rukia ask while Renji look around the interior. "We were to preocupied with our own jobs and when we had time to talk it was limited, never really talking to each other's life over the past three years."

"Nah, my life is just ordinary like most people, when I don't know where to go, I called Shuuhei and then he's offered me to work with him, at that time I met and befriends with other people that right now becomes my housemates. Their real home is far from this city and our own saving was still low back then, so we decide to rent a house for more efficiently." he has a fond smile when he remembered the first time he met them.

It's not really exactly a happy memories, each one of them coined different characters that make them fight with each other everytimes there were a problem, especially him and Ikkaku. But when they learn that he was pregnant, they were becomes protekif to him. There're a times when the cravings was pretty weird but they still tried to fullfil it without so much protest, not to mention when he had a mood swing, that was really a hell for the other mans in their house. The girls always keep eyes with what's suppose he eats what's not, and they're accompany him with exercise for pregnant mother, even held a baby showers for him. It was annoying at first but then he can't help but fell happy, at least he was not alone.

"..ji... RENJI." That's make Renji's out of his nostalgia and stare at Rukia.

"WHAT?" he unconsciously shout too

" I've call you many times, before now you had a day dreaming face with a big smile on your face, it was creeping me out, you know." Rukia said as she glared at her friend. " and by the way we've arrive."

Renji blush a little "Sorry"

* * *

Renji glanced around the magnificent Hotel, everything so fancy here that he feel so out of place and his nervous came back again.

Rukia looking up to see his reaction, as expected, his mouth was wide open, gaping at everything from the chandelier, to the paintings on the wall. She couldn't help but smile at his friend dumbstruck look. Can't help it this was the first time Renji came to a place like this.

"Renji if you continue to open your mouth like that, we don't know if something will get in there." She teased.

Renji immediately shut his mouth and blush again.

"Well the show won't start until half a hour later, want to walk around to spend times?" Rukia offered

"Lead the way." He can't dweel in there for a minute again, people stare at them strangely just because he had tatoos and with one of the directors of a big enterprise, Rukia seems to has been used by something like this.

He follow Rukia quickly, they stop many times to stare at a beautiful craft in the middle of pond that has many fish swiming so freely in there, a mountain of artificial sweets and toys that's seems for entertain the guest's children, an amazing ice sculpture of a beautiful woman, and a painting that paint a cute bunny that more likely what they say ..._Chappy...?_, Rukia stare at the paint with clear awed on her face and won't moving even Renji has shake her shoulder manytimes, He even had to dragged her to another derection. He doesn't know what was good from that bizzare painting... maybe ever.

When they spot a garden they're sat on the bench. Renji sigh and closed his eyes for a moment, then he opened it again as he stare at Rukia.

"So it was your turn to tell me your life."

There was a short sillent between them for a moment, Rukia's seems to think what she should say what's not, then she begin to speak "Well, when I realize what's happen I felt disappointed and very angry with them, I decide to cool my head for a while so I went to China for continue my study. When I graduated, my big brother contact me almost_ every single day_, want me to go home and work in our company... well, I can't make myself reject him. So here I'm now becomes director of the Kuchiki Corporation."

"Wow, you must often treats me then." He dumpfound. "How many times you come to orphanage?"

"once in month, it was pure luck that I spot you when I came, who knew that we live so close, right?" She told him. "The security was the one that told me when I ask him about someone that had red hair and tattoos."

"After that I know that was really you, and when I've appointment with Genryusai-san for business, I ask again and said that I had met you before the meeting, he finally said _that's true_ that you came to orphanage. Then he ask me if I may know the reason about you won't visit for a long times." At this she frowned a bit. "I said the answer was obvious, but he said that you're the one that told him there was for _another_ reasons. Tell me about this _reason_!" She demand and Renji knew she won't let him go before he's answer it.

Renji confuse to just tell her or not. _'Well... maybe this was the right oppurtunity to tell her about Ryoji. If she know about this from other people she deffenitely would murder me,"_ he conclude.

"I have a son." He whisper.

"Come again?" her hearing ability was perfect, but now she doubted it.

" . ." He said more clearly and slowly.

"WHAT?" she unconsciously leaned closer and shout in his ear that make him wince.

"Sussh... keep your voice down." Rukia then realise people around them stare at their directions.

"How, when, why, where, and whose the mother, it's one of your housemates?" She leaned back and bombered him with questions.

"Calm down, you will know soon when you see him." The redhair grinned at her, he can't wait to see Rukia's face when she saw him.

"I want to know now!" she dissapointed he not tell her sooner, if she knew she will bring her nephew a present when she visit early. "Why don't you told me sooner, I really want to see him right this instant!" She whined

"Easy Rukia, You will see him when the show is over, and belief me the explanations is a lot easier when you see him direcly."

"Ohh, fine then." She sulk and crossed her arms over her chest, she make a mental noted in her head about this and demand his explanation after the events, _oh it must be good or else_.

* * *

"Where's the recital room?" He ask after they quite satisfied with exploring the hotel.

"This way."

The recital room was quite big, might be able to accommodate two hundred people and everything from piano to the seats were from the best quality, no wonder the tickets were really expensive. many people has come when they're get there. He recognized almost all of the guests are important or famous people.

"God, I'm come to another world." He stunned

"OH please Renji, don't over-reacting again." Rukia rolled her eyes while take him to their seats. their seats were in the middle of rows.

Renji frowned when he knew Rukia will sit beside him. "Don't you want to sit with your brother Rukia? He must comes here too right?"

"Yes, he is."she scowled. "But I don't want to near him right now, beside sit here much better than sitting in the front rows."

"Why? I though your relationship with him has improved." He arched his eyebrow.

"He want me to break up with Kaien. He think he was useless." She said angrily. "Like hell I would. He don't even know him"

This was truly a sight, ussualy despite how much angered she held, she will always obey what the stoick man's wants.

"Okay, now calm down and sit here." He comforted her.

Kaien was her lover from teenagers, Renji found that Kaien had a good personality always wants to help everybody that needs, and he was a hard workers and a loyal friend. Back then the three of them hangout with each other, frequently. He knew Rukia and Kaien just set their eyes from each others. The first time he met Kaien, he can't hide his shocks, Kaien has had to much resemble with Ichigo, they face and personality were almost the the same to each other. Except Rukia's lover was more sociable, easiers to hanged out together, smile and talk more, and of cource no permanent frown on his face.

When Ichigo appear and sat on the tools, everyone in the room felt silence at once. Renji took notice about his appeareance, he still has strange but beautiful orange colour hair that has gotten longer, more muscular and very manly now. After three years Ichigo becomes a handsome man, he was attractive before but now he becomes a _very sexy and seductive _young man. He can see why his friends were drooling after him, and he pretty sure he heard almost all the guests around him were swallows hard and majority has a lustfull gaze at him. And the object was looks oblivious, _'still pretend not to take notice around his surrounding.'_ He aware as he shook his head.

Then Ichigo's take a deep breath while closed his eyes and open it as he begin to playing classical music first, all guests speechless and spellbound by the music.

Actually many of the piece were suppose to be played slowly but Ichigo played it with fast tempo that he don't know how can he manage to do that... normally it will sound weird if other pianist played like that... but NO, he can make it sound... so right and fit like it was supposed to played like that. He's making he's own music, so free and so absord in his own play.

every single notes feel like that were his own piece of hearts that make it more passionated and hotter. Renji was to memerized by the music that he feel like he was paralized, to afraid to move or even divert his eyes to another direction.. just because he don't want to miss any single notes.

It's even more poised and beautiful from when Renji heard it back then, it was like when he played in the past was just only a games. He heard Rukia sighed beside him to awed at his music. Then he begin to play the last piece. _"CANON"._ Renji remembered the piece to well, it was the very first piece he heard Ichigo's played, he searching for two weeks long and then he's begin to feel stupid because this piece was very well known in public and he didn't even realize it. Ichigo was always played this piece that make him memorize every single tone.

Ichigo looks so serene when he played it, his eyes closed and there was a soft smile on his face like he remembered something wonderful and nice. When he finished, everyone give him standing applause and loud cheers, but Ichigo not moved from the stools, He stared at the audience and for a moment Renji thought that Ichigo's eyes focused only to him but he quickly shrugged it of. Then Ichigo began to play another piece, everyone looks confuse but nonetheless they sit back and listen again. Who doesn't want to hear another piece from a wonderfull pianist for free?"

Renji breath caught when he heard it, he's shakking uncontrollably, his cheeks were started to wet from the tears. _He remembered it... he remembered our promise..._

"Renji, what's wrong?" ask Rukia when he realize her friend's conditions. Just minutes ago he was fine, and suddently he act like this.

"Rukia... I need to left now... just meet me in the lobby." He said in the midst of sobs. Before Rukia can response, he stand up and burst toward the exit.

* * *

_'what is it?"_

_"You... you always played with so much sadness, angered, or despair." He said as he sat up and point his finger at orange head's face. Ichigo was very surprise at his friend's outsburst, but keep silent, and note him to continue._

_"Of course I'm not complaining of your ability, but I want you to play a peacefull piece just for once, at least if I'm come to your concert or recital..." Renji said as he gave Ichigo's the most sincere and beautiful smile that make all of his sorrows vanised immediately when he saw that smile. "Amazing Grace."_

_Ichigo felt silent for a moment, too enthralled by that, and then he shake his head to signify his agreement as he's close his eyes with soft smile on his face._

* * *

Renji can't decide what's the best to descripe his feeling right now. Happy? _For they're still remember each other's promise_... Sad? _Because this is really an ironic_... Angry? _for become an idiot because he's still madly in love for him..._

There're to much emotion that swirls around his minds, he'd like to laugh, cry, and screams in the same times. Just because for one reason... one person... Ichigo. Why he still has an effect to him? He feel like a high scholl girls in love. He hate it from the bottom of his hearts, but can't help it he was trapped in his own feeling.

Renji stand on one of the balconies to get some fresh air as he stared at the dark sky, the cold night air hit his face gently. The redhead felt more relaxed now and his tears has stoped for quite a while. He looks at his watch on his wrist, think that the recital would had been finished long ago, and Rukia has been waiting for him in the lobby. But he's not move from there, he can feel that there's someone that stare at his back, and very intense to.

"Renji..."

What? No way... it can't be... why Ichigo's here?

He knew that his body's stiffened, and he fisted his hand's very hard. He won't turn over, and not say a single word to him. He doesn't want to see what's the other's expressions, he affraid if he's see the orange hair's face on face, he can't control his feeling anymore. The redhead can feel that his tears could burst anytimes. He blamed him for this.. why Ichigo?... Why not someone else?... if he fall in love with someones else maybe he can be more happy. Ichigo always makes his feeling was like on the edge.

After a minute past and no response of Renji, Ichigo sighed and walk toward him, he leaned against other balcony beside Renji. Renji still locked away, not want to see him. He thought that in a short times he met many people from his past. First the old man... then Rukia, and then Him... what's next? _Entire world?..._

"Renji... please look at me." There's a desperate tone on his voice. Renji frown a bit, for what's he so desperate like that?

"Renji... I...you..." Ichigo want to say something, but cut off by Renji

"Don't... if you only want to say sorry, keep it, I don't need it." The redhead finally response, his voice suprisingly calm despite the rage inside him as He back away of him and start to left the place. Before he can manage to go inside, Ichigo's caught his arm as he force him to see him on the eyes.

Renji finally look at him, his eyes hardened and his face's not showing any emotions, he doesn't want Ichigo's to know what he's thinking like he was always do. But when he's seeing Ichigo's on the eyes, his guts waver a bit. There's so much emotions in that's eyes... sad... guilty... regret... despair... miss... and... he don't know, the last ones was hard to describe. Renji felt a small shiver through his body at that emotions.

Before Renji can shake him off, Ichigo hug him tightly "Renji, Renji, Renji..." he mumble the name over and over like it was a prayer.

Renji's face painted with red because of anger and embarrased, "The hell? Cut it of... get off me..." he's struggled. But cut off by kiss, which was soon followed by another and another.

Renji was to shocked to response. There's a murmur in the inside that makes him out of his daze. He push him off and turn to walk away. But it's not just him that snapped from the daze, so as soon as Renji back away from him, he grapped hold Renji's on the wrist as he literally dragged him away.

"The hell are you doing? Let me go..." protest Renji as he attemp to loose the Grip, but his voice felt on the deaf ears and the gripped on his wrist only more thighter.

"Shit, Ichigo... where're we going?"

"If you don't want me to kiss or molest you in public, you've to come with me." Said Ichigo with cold voice. That's make Renji shut his mouth and reluctantly let Ichigo to drag him.

"Fine." He sighed, "Would you let go of my wrist, Now, please?" He did his best to keep his voice as silky smooth as he could, feeling a bit stupid as he did so.

"No." The pianist's voice was firm and avoid any emotions

Renji's eyebrow twich in annoyance. He sighed again and just let Ichigo's led him into the lift to the thirtieth floor, he had a bad idea about this, he would like to just go away and never come back again but the hand on his wrist not allowed him to left Ichigo's side. Then he feel something vibrated on his pants, _What's that? Ah my cellphone._ He thought as he pull out his cellphone of his pocket and seeing there's many miss call and message from Rukia's and his housemates. He stopped immediately and make Ichigo halt his walk as he stare at him.

"Ichigo, I need to go now, there's some people waiting for me." The redhead ask as he tried to loosening the grip. Ichigo just glare at the phone, then he take it from his grasp and when he see the message he face's frown even more than usual, and take inisiatif to replied the messages then turn off Renji's cellphone. After that The pianist continue to walk as he dragged Renji with him.

Renji's very surprise at what Ichigo's doing, he's open his mouth than close it than open his mouth again... to shocked to talk... then..

"WHAT THE FUCK ICHIGO? GIVE ME BACK MY CELLPHONE? WHAT'RE YOU SEND..." He shout with so much anger in it, only to be close by someone mouth at his. The kiss was gentle at first but as times pass it was more and more fiercy.

Ichigo not even bother to reply Renji's questions, he went back to deeply kiss the other man. Renji can't think of anything other than how nice the feeling. He even don't realize that the pianist had maneuver them into his suite room. when his back came in contact with a soft bed that snapped him out from his daze, he immediately courage all his strange to pushed Ichigo of. When both of them had separate a little, he punch Ichigo's on his face. his face blush furiously, The tears now was violently flowing down to his cheeks, he tried to wiped it out, but a new one always come out again and again.

"What do... you... want?... Playing with my hearts... again?" he sobbed uncontrobably. Ichigo's eyes widened and pulled back from Renji, he felt so guilty and feel like the most dumbass person on the planet to make the one he love sad like that... again. He wiped Renji's tears with his hands and kiss his cheeks gently, Renji didn't response, however he didn't resist the attention, either.

"I'm sorry, I..." Ichigo hesistated a little, he doubted Renji will accepted this well. "I still love you so much, Renji... please come back to me." He begged him while holding his hands hard.

There's something boiling in his hearts when he heard that confesions. He won't belief it, never. Then he brush his hands, stand up, and walk away toward the door.

"Wait... please, wait Renji, I want to explain everything to you."

"For what? There's no need a fucking explanation, I understand everything... you just need someone for a subtitute for your lover.. What? He can't do it right now? To busy in his own work? Why don't you just stop being a pianist and just got marry to him?" he snapped as he spat all of his frustration.

"By the way, I need to left, _someone_ has waiting for me at home." He knew that someone can be mean anyone, but he won't spil it out if that someone was their son.

Renji left the room without looking back. He missed the looks that Ichigo's had, he missed the determination look and a few tears that were falling on the cheeks. He won't let anyone else other than him to have Renji. Renji was his... and his alone. Even Renji has had someone else he just to made Renji love him more. After those years felt lost, he won't make the same mistake twice, he won't let Renji leave his side ever again.

* * *

Renji left Ichigo's suite room as fast as he can, he don't want to deal with him for even a minute again, he went inside the lift to the first floor, wondered if Rukia still there waiting for him or not.

_Tingg..._ as the lift's door open

He quickly walk down the hallway to the lobby, for his relief, Rukia still waiting of him. She leaned her back to one of the pillars, she crossed her arms over the chest, and tapped his foot over and over. _She must be very upset_ he thought as he swallowed a little.

"Ru-" before he can greet her, she saw him and run toward him with an angry expressions.

"RENJI... WHAT AR-"

"please calm down Rukia, I can explain this... someone take my cellphone and send the message as he pleases." He said quickly before Rukia can pull out her anger.

Rukia not belief him fully, but calm herself down, her breath was raging however she's note Renji to continue his explanations.

"... I met Ichigo and.." Now her rage was not for Renji, but for the pianist

"WHAT HE DO?" she shout

"Nothing, he just... Shit, forget that, lets go home."

Rukia only nodded at him, she knew her friend's exhauted of what he's encounter, and keep silent, not even ask a single questions during the trip.

* * *

When he arrive at his home, after say goodbye to Rukia, he immediately run toward his room not bother to greet his housemates that still awake. In his room he saw Ryoji has slept soundly, not wanting to disturb his son's slumber, he carefully laid on the bed, thinking back about what happen, he frowned a bit, if he remembered corectly Ichigo takes his cellphone and replied his messages as his please. _what The hell he send?_ Renji tried to search his phone from one pocket to others, however there's nothing like phone in there. Then something click in his mind. his face lose all the blood immediately. his hands tremble very hard and his mouth open wide. his eyes show of his affraid.

OH SHIT... SHIT... SHIT...

It's still at Ichigo's. _How can he forget something like this?_ Sure he was to mad to even think other then left that room as soon as posible, but really, how he can be so carelessly, the phone saved almost every single number of his friends and clients. Not forgoten the fotos that almost everything about him, his friend's, and most important his son's. If Ichigo manage to aware that the foto was their son's... "Oh god, I'm doomed."

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